excess isn't always bad

when i look at the stars each night, sometimes i hope i'll see nothing. many people are annoyed by unpredictable behavior, whether it's their cable service, the post office, or coworkers that let them down. personally, i can't stand the knowledge that things will never change. the night sky just doesn't shift around enough for me to get excited about the emergence of this or that constellation. perhaps we could privatize the night sky. one of those hollywood firms could do something special with such a large canvas. i wouldn't even fast forward through the celestial commercials. consider that a promise.

last week, i discovered that my dog was allergic to termites. considering what they say about glass houses and the like, i figured it was time to finally throw out the futon. you want your furniture to give life to the apartment in a metaphorical sense. it really is downhill once that becomes a literal fact, and i don't care if you tell me i should be glad i don't have fleas. tomorrow i'll be over at your place revving your luxury convertible's engine in the driveway and drinking your seltzer. remember, it's always important to examine life from an optimistic perspective. you should be glad i won't be burning the ticker symbols of my favorite stocks into your persian rugs.