in which dyes and fabrics are discussed at length

i have a couple of theories about what is wrong with america, but the important one is that we purchase too many pre-faded hats. this seems only to be a problem in the cotton category, as polyester and wool are much less likely to actually fade in real life or in some weird fading factory. if wealthy, lazy people really want faded hats, they should pay someone to wear the hats for them until they're properly broken in. i think perhaps the ability to flop down a twenty or two and obtain a perfectly weathered hat proves just how far we have gone to indulge the fancies of those who want something that has only artificial value.